Tips on fixing a work relationship

If you realistically think about it, we tend to spend a lot of time at work- perhaps even more in management positions. Considering this and just plain productivity reasons (that improves when our working relationships are good), it’s important to consider factors that can enable us to improve relationships with our bosses and colleagues alike. Everyone has a bad day and a wrong foot-ed start to the proverbial Manic Monday.

Tips on fixing a work relationship

But that is no reason to take the bad mood to the next work meeting because sometimes conflicts are just plain difficult to avoid. Especially in a multi-cultural environment with everyone coming from different standpoints, there are situations where everything will potentially not be appealing all at once.

This can make workplace situations really tricky. It may sometimes feel overwhelming to resolve, but considering that your next project may happen to be with this same boss or colleague, it is effort worth undertaking! We have a few important tips for fixing a work relationship here today. More as you read further…

Tips on fixing a work relationship

1. Do Something

Even if you do not know exactly why you never see your colleague is never at your table and feel the iciness between you because of a misunderstanding, you need to act. Doing nothing will certainly not help. Do not wait till a ‘situation’ arises. There is never the right situation for unpleasant news. If it needs you to overcome your internal fear or discomfort, do that. You will feel better no matter what your counterpart says, because you give yourself a chance to solve things!

2. Stay Objective

No matter what it is: the currency is always to remain objective and clear. Let the problems never slip to the ‘personal’ side, in which case you have already lost control. Even if it was a personal issue for you, try to clarify at a professional and objective level.

If you get personal, you will either be called drama queen or your counterpart will ‘attack’ and you will just end up making yourself vulnerable. In addition, it is important to choose a neutral place where you will be undisturbed. The high-traffic kitchen let alone one of the office cubicles is certainly not the best place. Get some fresh air in the park around the corner or grab a coffee.

This ensures no one feels ‘physically’ inferior or superior because the conversation is in ‘his/her territory’.

3. Be honest and stand your ground

It takes two to tango or argue, in this case. However, this does not mean you have to bury yourself under some charges. Be honest and straight forward. Admit to a genuine mistake and do not overreact. You do not want to burn bridges.

This does not mean that your counterpart can now sit back or is in a better negotiating position. Reflect on your actions and allow yourself to admit that you may have made an inappropriate remark. This helps not just the situation, but also helps you learn and develop. If the counterpart does not admit to his/her mistakes, do not fret. You can not control how others react. However, you can have a clear conscience at the end of the discussion, even if your commitment fell on ‘deaf ears’.

4. What is the potential solution?

You need to prepare a potential solution to resolve the issue in advance. If you come up with proposals for your counterpart beforehand, even if they refuse it, you can understand what lies at the heart of the conflict. If your colleague simply dismiss your opinions, it puts them in bad light.

So he/she may even reconsider solving the problem and not holding on to a conflict especially since you tried to be proactive and solution oriented. It is also good to anticipate the reactions from you colleague in advance. Proceed know the ‘best case’ and the ‘worst case’ and determine how you would want to react in each situation. Then you can bring an appropriate counter reaction and ensure your colleague does not get too upset and the situation is under control.

5. Put things in perspective

Are you now thinking why am I supposed to do everything? Believe us, it can be quite helpful to put things in perspective and consider it from another person’s view point. Perhaps you will realize where a different perspective is coming from (could it be a different cultural mindset or even a stupid misunderstanding?).

In general, we always need to look at problems from another person’s perspective to be empathetic. The moment you put yourself in someone else’s shoes, it all seems a tad altered, don’t you think?

6. Do not struggle all alone

If other people are affected, you should inform them in time and get their opinions on an issue. Act as soon as a situation arises. If another person is directly impacted, get them to the conversation as well. You can also get people with a neutral perspective to help you go through different potential solutions.

Always look for an even number of people to join in a conversation, and not just from one side, no one wants to be attacked or sit on the fence all alone. If this is your work group, then it will also help you strengthen the sense of belonging in the team.

7. Stay on target

If you have reconciled with your colleague, then there’s no need to talk further or point out further issues. What has been sorted clearly does not need further discussion. Surely some weight has fallen off your chest and talking through a dispute could indeed have some with stress.

The next steps could be an initiatives to rebuild trust, talk to one another, go out for a coffee and work at behaving respectfully with each other. If not as friends, but colleagues who can work together efficiently.

8. Stay respectful irrespective of the outcome

It is important that you avoid being disrespectful at all points no matter what the outcome of the conversation is. Listen to your colleague and do not interrupt. It may not be pleasant and you may want to justify quickly. Give your colleague some time. Even if at first your colleague does not want to share anything, you have now taken the first step.

Now the ball is in their court. You could again ask perhaps a couple of times more, but then if nothing happens, then, leave it there. Perhaps the colleague does not care enough about your relationship. However, always maintain respect and be polite.

For whatever reason your colleague is not talking to you, it is no longer your problem, but theirs. You have shown good will and tried for improvement. And you can’t force anyone in this matter.

We hope that these tips can help you prevent or solve for an impending dispute with a colleague or your boss. Have you ever had such an experience and followed something else that helped? Please feel free to share it with us!



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